Yesterday this thought come to mind; what if I take a look at where I currently am and give thanks for everything that has brought me to this space. Wouldn't it be nice if I could look at NOW with the understanding that where ever "here" is needed everything on the path to get me to this space, and in this now moment I know more about where I want to go, and who I am than ever before? Why is it that I sometimes choose to focus on people, conditions, and situations, rather than in this now moment where I have a new understanding of what I want more clearly than before? Talk about the present, now that is a gift.
So many times I state I want to dwell in this "bliss" space and then some situation comes along to change that. Today I want to focus on situations as being a gift to assist me in knowing better who I am, and bless it for showing me the way to the new path I want to journey down. How many times have I stated that I wanted this pair of shoes only to get them home and decide that they weren't what I had hoped them to be. I can insert the word, (job, home, relationship, etc, or whatever) in that sentence knowing that so many times in my life I thought if I could have this or that I would be happy. Only to find myself once there saying the same statement about some "NEW" thing. Today I understand that happiness has NOTING to do with the situation and everything to do with how I view it. I am responsible for my happiness and to place that task on anyone or anything is unfair and unrealistic at best.
In my relationship with my honey today I have BLISS moments all the time, why because I look for them. Each day I wake up next to my honey is the best day of my life. Why? Many reason's but the one I have control over is what am I looking for, for today I understand that which I seek, I find. Each day I get up and look for new ways to love, and express that love. I look for new greatnesses about him, and things to be grateful for. Sure enough everyday I found hundreds of them. Does that mean that all the relationships until now were bad ones, no it means I needed them to become the person I am today, and for that I am grateful. Just as I needed all the friendships in my life to be the friend I am today. I needed all the growth in my life to be the LOVE I am today, I am the one who chose to see it as pain, bitterness, discomfort.
The one thing I do know today is that in order for NOW to change I have to release how I see it, in order to call in something new. It is very hard to hold on to what you had yesterday, and pick up the newness of today.
Thank you for showing me the way.
I love you
Rev. Allen
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