Did you See it?

Did you see it?

It was amazing!!

This morning as I was posting the daily post for Amor, I looked out the open window to see the morning sky.  It was that magical canvas I so often talk about.  All the reds, pinks, yellows, and purples mixed together in what was a site to behold.  My first thought was to take a picture.  Then I took a breath and decided to just be in the moment.  It was one of those moments when a picture could not capture all the magic within that moment. 

This wonderful thought came to mind; what if the blinds were closed!  I might have missed the magic and wonder of it all.  How many times in my life do I look at the window for the view only to find that I have lowered the blinds, closed them, pulled the draperies, and think nothing wonderful happening here?  How many times do I look at the window and see the wonder of the universe and not pause for a moment to take it in?  How easy it is to listen to the ego tell me that no one is really interested in your beautiful sun rise anyway. 

I state often “We see that which we want to see in life.”  Today I took the time to see the beauty in the universe and know that the same beauty is with in me as well.  I allowed the wonder of nature to show me the way to love and seeing the beauty that surrounds me all the time. 

Take a moment, check to see if the windows of your soul are open to the beauty that surrounds you every day!

I love you

Rev. Allen

Unpacking

When I talk to people about what baggage we take with us on our journey in life, many of us might say, “Oh, I don’t have any baggage.”

In a workshop I gave a couple years ago I asked everyone in the class to bring a bag with sacred items with them to the class. I then asked for each person to share with their neighbor what they had in their sacred bag and why it was important to them. Then we talked about how attachments and sacred items are baggage we often take around in life. I then asked that we allow our neighbor to care for our sacred bag and keep it safe for the remainder of the workshop. It was at that moment that we all realized we have items in our carry-on.

I am a very confident man and have for some time now carried what some lovingly refer to as a “man-bag, murse” you get the picture. I realize from time to time that it’s fully loaded, and there are those times when my honey or a friend will hand it to me, and say: “Wow, what do you have in this thing bricks?” I know that I have attachments in life, and that I ask everyone that I enter into a relationship with to then make room for me, and my bag.

I have often made the word bag, baggage, luggage, to be a bad word when used to describe those things I am holding on to, or those things I have attachment to. One of the great Buddhist teachings is the art of detachment; the ability of letting go and going with the flow. I am doing better with that each day. Things like; how you and I get to the store may be very different and letting go of your path and how you get there. Those seem to be fairly easy these days, and then as if on cue a friend will say “I am moving to another state”, or “I have a new job and I will be traveling a great deal more.” It is at those moments when I realize that I have my bag wide open and I am busy packing.

Sometimes I pack for a day trip, other times I may pack for a month, and depending on the level of attachment, I may even pack everything I own and put it in boxes marked fragile. A few years back when I needed to relocate due to health reasons, I first had to ask for help from my parents, (life lesson) then I had to be open to the way they packed, stacked, labeled, and stored the boxes. Talk about seeing your attachments first hand. Let’s just say that most of my life I have been an “A-type” personality. When I talk about carry-ons, what I really mean is steamer trunks. One of the amazing things that my journey into joy has taught me is the art of letting go. Oh I still have my moments and then I remember to breathe deeply and say the words “I Trust!”

This idea of unpacking came about while thinking about all the things in my bag. Do I surround myself with folks who I trust my scared items with, and are they willing to help me unpack? I’m not talking about them doing the work for me, I am talking about being there to remind me it’s safe, I have this, and that it’s time to unpack. You know, no matter how great I get at the art of detachment, I choose to remember that from time to time regardless of what is going on I really need to take everything out of my bag and make sure it still holds value. When I do that it helps me keep my carry-on light and able to fit in the overhead compartment of life. Enjoy your journey, remember to pack light, and remember to unpack and enjoy your stay.

I love you

Rev. Allen

Attention vs Intention.

The book for the Amor Book Group for the month of March has been The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success by Deepak Chopra.  What an amazing book! One of the understandings in the book that I have taken to heart is “Attention vs. Intention.”  One of the things that I teach at Amor is that there is nothing outside of us.  “Everything we need to know, we already have.”  This is not to say that we do not learn from the things going on in our world. This is a reminder to self that the answer always lies within.  I have noticed within myself that I will often put the “attention” on someone else to take it off of myself.  Another one of those sayings I love is “no matter where you go there you are”. 

With attention, I find I am looking outside of myself for an understanding or an idea that will explain what is going on or why.  At Amor we understand "why" stands for “What Happened Yesterday” and that it really is of no use to me today.  During my personal journey with cancer, I found that everyone was putting their attention on the fight, the cause, the reason…the "why?"  It was in that moment in my life that I went inside.  One of the lines from the book, finding the Joy in Cancer, which I love is “It was at this time I become my own practitioner, healer, and teacher.”  I took the time to look inside myself to see what was going on with me rather than putting all the focus on the outside.  I had been living the other way far too long.  That was the very thing that brought me to this place.  I had focused all my attention on what others thought of me and what would make them happy.  It was eating me alive. 

Once at this place, I realized that I needed to know what was happening on the inside if I wanted to change what was happening on the outside.  I started choosing what I wanted in my life rather than taking "come what may.”  I learned this great technique from an Ester and Jerry Hicks' book about writing out my intention.  I started using that and continue to use it to this day.  What is it that I want to happen in this now moment?  What do I intent to bring to this now moment?  What is my intention? 

With this and other tools in my tool box I realize I am responsible for what I bring to the table.  I am responsible for my attitude, my joy, my happiness, and most importantly, how I love myself. I have learned that I had known this truth all along and forgotten it somewhere along the path.  I could have at that moment put all my “attention” on finding out where, or I could continue with my “intention” on looking inside knowing that what I create on the inside of my life is what must be made manifest on the outside. To remember I am responsible for how I see things, and how I love myself. 

I have found my truth to be that attention is outward focused, and intention is inward focused.  Today I know for myself that everything I need to know is within.  Take some time today and look within for the answers in your life. 

I love you

Rev. Allen

What's Next

I am reading the TAO and understand it and all consciousness to be one and the same.  The TAO talks about microcosm and macrocosm within it as well. I really love the path that I am on at this moment. Looking for ways to expand and expanding who I am and what I believe. I believe that this is what all master teachers teach and applaud any and all paths in getting there. After all it is the journey more so than the destination. I find that once I have reached a destination and pause to enjoy it I find myself asking; “What is next?”  Where do I want to go next, what do I want to see, who do I want to be? 

I think that is what we do when we transition into the next journey after this physical one ends. I believe that once I reach that point I am quite happy to go on the next journey. 

Do I fear death? 

I would say at this moment I embrace the journey I am on, I realize there is indeed a destination and at some point I will reach it. I don’t feel the need to fear it as it is really like going to Disney, Paris, or the moon for that matter. Once there, I choose where I go from there. 

This is very different from when I was younger with the beliefs I held true then. The fear of making a mistake and being sent to hell, or angering the folks who make the decisions and being punished for something that made them unhappy, much like an innocent person in prison. 

Today I see it as I have lived in hell already with some of the beliefs and choices I have made. Living in the here and now really is the definition of Heaven to me. Enjoy this now moment seeing, experiencing, looking for every drop of good there is, and seeing it all as good. Surely that is Heaven in the here and now. 

This is not to say that others are wrong and I am right about this. It states where I AM in this earthly experience as a spiritual being. 

All is Well
I love you 
Rev. Allen

Vulnerable

Vulnerable - Capable of Being Physically or Emotionally Wounded.

This is the definition that I found in looking up the word vulnerable. Yet I have over the last few days felt the gentle nudge which I know to be the Divine wanting me to blog about it. 

I love the Five Love Languages by Chapman. I speak on them all the time. I ask all of my friends and community members to take the test and communicate the answer to me. Someone from the outside looking in might see that as being open to vulnerability. If I tell someone how I want to be loved that makes me open to being wounded emotionally. In words I use often “I can hear that.”

My personal love language is quality time, it doesn’t mean I want you to spend endless amounts of time with me, it means I want our time together to matter. I want you to be open, honest, sharing, and vulnerable. Not that I may use it against you at some future time; but, so that I might love you in a way that truly matters to you. 

Love is one of those places I find we are so guarded and closed off like we are ready for battle or in fear for our lives. It is no wonder we don’t feel loved and appreciated. I spend a great deal of my time looking for ways to be as open, and revealing as I can. I have had people say in the past you are too revealing and too vulnerable. Here are some other words I use a great deal “Not my truth.”

Most of my life I spent hiding. Who I was, what I liked, what I wanted, how I felt, letting you know what I thought about the matter, and most of all from loving myself. Today I wish to live my life open; transparent is a word I love to use. I look at it like this, when I have shared openly and honestly my secrets and thoughts, I don’t see that as being vulnerable I see it as freedom. I do not have to remember what I have told you, or fear what you may know. It frees me up to do the thing I do best in life. LOVE: 

I find in loving myself and others that the people who surround me really are there only to love me. After all that is the law of attraction at work. With that thought in mind what do you think we surround ourselves with when we are guarded, closed off and our defenses at maximum? 

Today, I may be opening myself to hurt, yet I know that in doing so I also open myself up to being loved. It’s worth the risk.

I love you 
Rev. Allen 

What if for today I choose Love?

What would happen in my world today if every decision I made was based on love?  Can I imagine a world where every decision is made with love?  Can I imagine a world where choosing to love and knowing that my every thought and feeling is based on loving thoughts and sending loving energy out to the world?  Can I imagine not having fear about anything, not worrying about the outcome, or having no attachment to what anyone thinks about anything; just love?   

Will you try this with me today?  Let’s not care about how long it last or if we only get in two minutes before we think of something other than love.  Those two minutes will have shifted the world forever.  What if we add just one more minute to our loving thoughts each day? In 60 days, we would have an hour out of our day that all we thought about was love.  How cool will that be?

Each day I wake up and say thank you to Universal Love.  Some call it God, Buddha, Jesus, Allah... you get the picture.   After my thank you I repeat I love you over and over again.  I spend more of my day sending love to everyone and anyone in my life that I might rather send something else too.  Why?  Because I know that love changes everything, which really means love changes me.  How I look at it and how I see it.  When I really want something in my life to shift, I have found that love is the perfect place to start.  When I love, I am flexible and easy going like water.  Water sees each opportunity as a new adventure and a chance to see the world in a different way.  Who cares who is sending out hate in the world? As my mother always said; “If so and so jumped off the cliff, would you jump with them?”  

What matters to me today is finding my way to loving more each day. The rest of the stuff will take care of itself.  

Let’s see how many minutes we can make it today!  All is Well.

I love you, 

Rev. Allen 

"Numbing out"

In the last few weeks I have been present with Spirit around those places in my life where I like to “not feel” or as I like to refer to them as “numbing out”. I realized while writing Finding the Joy in Cancer the many times I have used this to avoid feeling what is coming up in my life, or feeling, period. 

For years I would say that I wanted to feel better and the truth of the matter is I was not feeling. So, what would feeling better look like, let alone feel like? From childhood when I didn’t want to feel the feelings of being hurt I would fill the void with food, sleep, or other things little boys like to do. 

This pattern is something I took with me throughout my life. As I got older and discovered alcohol and drugs, that was my primary way of not feeling anything at all. Most of the time I was in a blacked out state or so well lubricated that I didn’t feel anything at all. As memories and dreams from the past begin to rise from those secret hiding places within my body that I had kept hidden, I would drink and drug more. And if that didn’t work I would give myself away to sexual pleasure and fantasy. 

After I stopped drinking and drugging I would find new ways to numb. Spending, shopping, food, pornography, sex, work, causes - anything to keep myself so busy as not to feel what I was feeling. What I know today is when I shut the door to “bad” feelings I was shutting the door to “good” ones as well. It took years for me to begin to see a pattern of behavior. 

I would work 16 or 18 hours a day, or go out shopping. When I would find a way to get those in-check I would find myself 20 pounds heavier and ask “how in the world did this happen?” I would spend every day in the gym to get back in shape only to spend 8 to 10 hours in the clubs looking for companionship for the evening. 

I wanted to experience this thing called balance. I realized that balance is a constant state of awareness, and adjustment. When I have this behavior, in order to return to balance I need to self-adjust, like an internal guidance system. Balance required that I be in an awakened state of being, so that I can make the adjustments to my course of travel at any point needed. 

Today my life runs from a place of expression, of feelings, a state of consciousness. One that allows me to flow and adjust as needed. It allows me to look at each situation as an opportunity for expansion, growth, joy, love and excitement. Today I find words like good, bad, right, wrong, less, and more as a sign of adjustment needed. Once fully present in the here and now I find it is best to breathe and enjoy the feelings. All is well. 

I love you 
Rev. Allen