Here we grow again.

Day 90 The Universe:

When my mentor suggested that I write a book about what it was like to live the four seasons I thought to myself "she is wonderful and all but she is crazy." A year of my life living the seasons what was she thinking? It is so interesting how we resist things that will help propel us forward. Not long after the talk with my mentor I gave a Seasons of Change workshop. As part of my desire to have others get this work I created a gratitude/share list so others would feel they were not alone. Being a person of action, I committed to doing the work with them. 

Season one was complete. 

In the middle of the first season, I gave another workshop and made the same commitment. As a result, of the timing, this meant that I had to keep going for yet another season. Season two was complete. As you may guess by now, a new pattern had been created and before you know it I was in Season three. Season three complete. It wasn't until I reached season four that I noticed what was happening. I was intent in helping others, and I didn't realize that I was in the midst of writing my third book. You guessed it a book about living through the four seasons. 

As I mentioned, it was not until season four that I became aware of patterns, things, and emotion that I was experiencing. I became aware of the depth of my sharing and how over the course of a year I had opened more than I thought possible. I became aware of the depth of this work and how it was transforming my life. I had intended to help others, yet the person I assisted in the rebuilding of his life was me. When I became aware of this growth my ego self-wanted at once to put a stop to any expansion going on. 

In season four I experience some life changing events and as a result, of this work I was able to remain present as I was firmly rooted in the understand that I embodied within myself the power to transform this into love. Our beloved Amor community experienced some hate crimes. Once again my mentor reminded me that I was such a source of love that it frighten others and frightened people often lash out. The moment I arrived at Amor after the first hate crime, I knew that my work was to be grounded and to love. I knew this was not a personal attack on me and that all was well. Being the spiritual leader of a community means that I have to opportunity to stand with others as they grieve. I did this to the best of my ability all the time standing rooted in love. 

I realize today at the end of season four that I was indeed in winter. It is a common thought that winter is death and dominant when in fact it is the time of growth. Just like with life we often base our opinions on outward appearances when in fact the real work is happening within. In season four I learned that regardless of what was going on outside I had a power that could and would transform any experience into a growth opportunity. Once I had this understanding, it seems as if I was determined to repeat this process again and again. I also realized that I chose to take on the responsibility of the survival of the community solely on my shoulders. As a result, I went back to some of my old patterns of behavior stress eating, and comfort eating which resulted in taking on 50 of the 75 pounds I had released. 

It wasn't until the last few weeks that I realized that for a community to survive the community has to want it. One person can not possibly do it by themselves. It was during out second hate crime experience that I began to understand this. What was, at first, calm has begin to fade and in it was replace was anger. Why is this happening to us/me? I know that anger masks fear and uncertainty, and most often we get stuck there. I know that was my experience. It took me about 120 days to complete season four's work. I needed to take some time and feel the emotions that were arising within. The outside would take care of itself once the inside had finished the process. Just like nature winter turns into spring and we notice all the work that has been going on within the tree as it begins to manifest on the outside. We often give spring all the credit when in fact it was winter who did the heavy lifting. 

The past two weeks my beloved and I have been working on a project in our home, and it has created the illusion of chaos. Many times in nature it appears chaotic before the calm. When a natural disaster occurs, it brings with it a host of emotions. The thing I admire most about nature is it doesn't take it personally, it assesses the situation and makes a plan for restoration. I see this every day, and yet it has been one of the most painful lessons of expansion. Last evening as we were restoring our home to it natural state I was in a hurry to get it complete and broke one of my favorite vases. I instantly went to surrender and release. My beloved said to me the room seems more open now that the vase is no longer there. I find that I often have to experience a tragedy to release things that are no longer needed? Which in turn creates an opening for expansion. Here we grow again.

I love you,
Thank you,
Rev Allen

Where shall we go today?

Day 89 Fireflies:

"You, like the firefly, are creating wonder everywhere you go. In your personal world, it may feel at times like your are standing still, when in fact you are flying around with great ease amazing all those around you".

The passage above is from today's reading in "Seasons of Change".  For most of my life, I have known that I am a nice person and that many people like to talk to me.  I get that I am a great life coach and that I can love people where they are.  I guess I just never really got that I was compassionate.

Compassionate (love) - Compassion is the response to the suffering of others that motivates a desire to help. Compassion motivates people to go out of their way to help physical, spiritual, or emotional hurts or pains of another.

On one of my many visits to see the doctor I had the opportunity to stand in the greatness of one of the check-in clerks, she was having an unusually hard day.   I noticed after that that she enjoyed checking me in when I made an office visit.  There was one occasion when I was severely sick she stated that she didn't like seeing me feel this way.  I thanked her and asked how she was doing?  She said that I was so kind I thanked her and told her to have a great day.  

I had the awakening after reading today's reading for the 4th time in a year that I AM a firefly.  I have spent my life flying around lighting up my life and the lives of those around me.  A former schoolmate highlighted this fact after finding me on social media stating that she remembered me as kind and friendly.  I remembered it to be a hellish experience.  Being constantly bullied for being different and yet somehow in the midst of that I found a way to make a difference in the lives of others.

On my last visit home to visit my parents I had the chance to see several people that I went to school with and was overwhelmed with the kindness and how each of them talked about how kind I was.   At the time, it felt like all I was doing was surviving.  I talk a great deal to my clients about allowing love, kindness and abundance into our lives.  My point of focus had been on getting through it and in the process had built a wall around myself to protect me.  One of the great life lessons is that in do so I do not allow things in or out.

Today I understand at a deeper level the light that I have within.  There are times when I feel that I am trapped in a mayonnaise jar, and I am not sure the person poked holes in the top for me to get air.  At that moment, the reality is that my ego has convinced me that there are limitations to what I can do and where I can go.  When in fact there is no jar, and I am free to roam the universe.  Where shall we go today?

Thank you,
I love you,
Rev Allen

Am I willing to receive the abundance that I asked for?

Day 88 Grand Canyon:

"You as an individual are just as magnificent as the Grand Canyon, Niagara Falls, or the Himalayan's. You hold within you everything that is needed to transform your world. We have been taught to believe that we are limited, inadequate, and lacking, despite the fact we hold within ourselves the original spark that formulated the earth. We can choose to remember each day the endless supply of power that we harness within our souls. It is this power that allows us to go from
"where we are to create the world we wish to see."

The above passage from today's reading from Seasons of Change, is inspiring. As I pay attention to the view outside our office, I am amazed at the abundance of life that I see intertwined and manifesting before me. I understand that what is true within nature is definitely true within me also. I remember when my beloved and I visited Snoqualmie Falls near our home. It is one of the most brilliant and beautiful experiences I have had here in the Northwest. One of the reasons why I was so excited was the unlimited potential that stood before my beloved and I on one of our first dates. It was almost overwhelming to receive the abundance that was being pictured before us. One of the truly amazing things about the falls is that regardless of its magnificence, it was being restricted by a damn upstream. How many times in our lives do we allow conditions, situations, or other peoples opinions of us to damn up the resources of our life?

Over the last few weeks, I have become aware at how well I receive abundance. I mentioned in my writing a few days ago about the importance of point of focus. That when I have my focus firmly rooted on that which I want, I become consciously unaware of everything else that is happening around me. Why is that important? Think about this: You are standing at the base of magnificent waterfall with your back to it. You know it is there, you can hear it, and yet you're unable to fully take it in because your focus is somewhere else. I became aware of the numerous times I have abundance flowing in, through, and as my life yet I still cannot take it in because my focus is somewhere else.

Over the last few days, I have noticed more ivy plants than I have ever seen before. They are magnificent and they are indeed abundant. Here in the Northwest ivy has a way of creating abundance and what many would consider growing out of control. I absolutely and unequivocally receive it as abundance in my life today. I had this deep and delightful conversation with a friend the other day in which we were speaking about traffic. They shared with me the overwhelming amount of traffic they had experienced while traveling into the Center. I paused for a moment, took in a nice deep breath, and shared with them the beauty of all of the ivy, and cherry blossoms that I had experienced on my drive in (Point of focus). I was reminded how often we ask for something in our lives and when it begins to manifest we become frustrated by the physical demonstration of that which we have asked for. Case in point: for a great deal of my life I have asked for abundance.  Yet when I find myself surrounded by traffic, I somehow magically forget that this is a tangible manifestation of that which I asked for.

"Am I willing to receive the abundance that I asked for?"

I realized from my conversation with my friends, we simply had a different point of focus. We sat down, laughed about it, and I invited them into the world of abundance. How many things can you recognize today as abundance? Imagine standing on the precipice of the Grand Canyon looking in. Here is this monumental expression of nature, in its most abundant form waiting for us to explore and find the beauty within it. Can you understand for a moment that standing on the rim only gives you one vantage point or one point of focus. Yet if you journey within the Grand Canyon, your point of focus begins to shift and you see things that have never been seen before. This is true within our lives as well. Often times we stand on the outside looking at condition, or experience, thinking this is all there is... when in fact that which we've been seeking is awaiting us within.

I love you,

Thank you,

Rev Allen

We have everything needed within us

Day 87 Aurora Borealis:

This morning's reading touched me deeply. I thought of the suns rays dancing with the atoms and molecules creating a light show unlike any we've ever seen in life. I've shared with you that over the last few days I've been diving deeper into my meditative process and as a result I am really recognizing the greatest that I hold within. Last evening my mind was filled with ego chatter. As we dig deeper into our soul consciousness anything that is unlike that consciousness must rise the to top and released. Much like cream rises to the top of milk. I took the anxiety that had been created from the ego mind into meditation which caused the ego mind to get louder. Ego is much like the intimidator that I spoke about yesterday. It really wants to be heard. My ego mind wanted to bring back to the foreground many times the thoughts that had been running through my head I have found through this work that when I acknowledge it, and thank it. It feels heard and has a greater ease with being released. I found within a few short moments of meditation a calm peace that allowed me to function with greater ease. I began to realize that there was a deep an abiding power within that I am learning to harness. A consciousness that it is at my disposal to support me in being the highest version of myself.

I think we've become so comfortable as a society with the understanding that power comes from outside of us rather than inside of us. The challenged with that understanding is that we're always reliant upon someone, or something else to supply the power we need. It's like thinking that the Power company is the only source of power for our homes. I really have a huge appreciation for solar energy as it works with the sun to bring out its greatest qualities. It recognizes the great qualities within the sun thereby create a self sustaining power from within itself. I think we have that same innate understanding within our selves. We have been conditioned for most of history to have a different understanding. Yet the truth is we indeed do have everything we need within us at any given moment.

I think of the consciousness of self sustainability. The ability to sustain oneself from within. I am aware that I have the capacity to grow my own vegetables, harvest them, and then produced a meal of my choosing. Growing up on the farm was a gift. I learned that I had within me the capability to plant a seed. Water it, and watch it grow to manifestation. I chose to cooperate with nature and the creative process to create something that I desired.

As a writer I find that ego mind wants to come in and create scarcity, lack, or fear. We have everything needed within us to create the divine consciousness that works with the universe to bring about a desired effect. When I think about the countless inventions that have been created through the divine mind, it reminds me that calming and centering myself and aligning with that consciousness of who I am is of the utmost importance.

That is the brilliance of the Aurora Borealis it works with the sun and the two of them together create a divine dance. When I work with my highest consciousness and the universe I am unlimited. That is the consciousness that I am asking each of us to embody so that we live lives filled with love, and abundance. I know that as you embrace the techniques within this book, and recognize your power from within that you are designed to have the life that you have always dreamed of having.

I love you,

Thank you,

Rev Allen

The Invisible Thread of Life

Day 86 Bees:

" Do you have any idea how many lives you have transformed by sharing your love?"

I love thinking about the countless peoples who's lives we have touched while journeying through life. It's like this invisible thread that weaves the fabric of who we are. I just love that I have friends who live all across the globe. I love that everything we see, touch, and experience has this profound impact on our lives and literally changes it forever. When we stop for a moment and recognize that if that is true in our lives that it has to be true in everyone else's lives. I just think of the countless times I've experienced someone who's having a really bad day at work and I took the time to ask them, how are you today? That one question has transformed more peoples interaction with me and allow me a different experience with the individual from that moment forward.

For much of my life I would always meet things with equal or greater force. In the business world, I become the intimidator. If people would speak to me loudly, I would speak to them louder. I realized today that is a tactic that is commonly used in the world and it is solely based in fear. Through my work over the last decade I have recognized that love is soft and finds its way under the situations and always has the capacity to stand in love for the other person. This softness has defused more situations than I could ever fathom. It has allowed me to listen with compassion thereby allowing the person to let go of whatever anxiety, fear, or worry they are having thereby creating an open space for dialogue. We are most often caught up in a self righteous privilege that has us thinking "this is a service that I am paying for and I deserve to be treated with respect." It is this mentality and standard operating procedure that have led us to the race consciousness that we have today. At the end of the day, when we think about it we are all ambassadors of love. I have determined that when I listen to someone It can make their day appeared brighter. It also brightens my day as well. In that process, I find that the customer service that I receive from that moment on far exceeds anything that I ever could have demanded from privilege.

We often neglect to consider the building blocks of our lives, bees, and oxygen, are prime examples. When I think about the fact that the brilliance of our food nation is based on the success of the bees pollination. Here's something that we find so insignificant that we hardly ever mention the brilliance of.Bee. But the very life-sustaining thing that we require in life to nourish us is solely linked to this brilliant invisible creature that absolutely charges nothing to bring the abundance of life. When was the last time you looked out into the universe and thanked the Bees for the work they do and their endless creative process. It's like oxygen, when was the last time you actually thank the universe for the air that you're breathing? When we begin to realize that there is an invisible thread that is appearing all through our life creating abundance and beauty without any assistance from us at all. We begin to recognize and realize the truth that we are surrounded by an abundant creative energy that is working to sustain and support us everyday.

Over the last few days, I have played a game. I call it the abundant game. Wherever I am, I look around for the countless expressions of abundance in it's many forms. One of the things that I have gathered from this game is that all of the abundance that I'm finding around me its brilliant expression is at absolutely no expense to me. It's free! It is waiting for me to acknowledge it, notice it, and most importantly receive it. After playing this game for just a couple of days I was delighted to go to the mailbox and find a check for $243.00 dollars. This check was absolutely unexpected and come from this invisible abundance that is always waiting for me to receive it. Most often, we spend our day looking for things that we are fearful of, or that we find agitating. I find with this one simple shift of 'mine" consciousness I am creating a world where I see the abundance that I have never seen before. By simply focusing my point of attention, or interest from lack to abundance it is already beginning to show up in my life in a physical and manifest way.

I hear the phrase time and time again "Life is hard!" For most of my life, I truly bought into that consciousness. It is through this book that I've begun to recognize that there is an abundant universe that creates out of itself amazing and wonderful things, most if not all without any support from human nature. When I can harness my own power and choose where to put my focus I began to use this transformative power at work in my life. If for no other reason my shift in consciousness brings about deeper breaths, a smile on my face, and lightness in my spirit. Well worth the investment.

I love you,

Thank you,

Rev Allen

Pack Your Bags and Hit the Road

Day 85 Cliffs:

What to do when you are standing at the edge of a cliff? I know that more times than not I have stepped back a few feet just to have my stomach feel a bit more comfortable. I know that at some level the fear was so great that I knew that was the best option for me. Today I really want to look at those time however that we allow fear to cause us to play small and run for safety. How many times is life do we hide our magnificence because fear tells us that we might fail at what we are choosing to embrace next. How many times will I discount the urging of my soul to take flight only to say that I have no idea how to fly?

Don't get me wrong I am not suggesting for a moment to put ourselves in danger. I am however asking us to put on our big girl and big boy pants and show up in our lives for our lives. We get to use all the courage we have gathered over the last 85 days and ask our higher selves the question. What is the highest and best for my life at this now moment and step boldly into that knowing full well that you have everything needed to fly. One of the reasons I wrote this book was the desire to see people living the life's they had on dreamed possible. The knowingness that the power that creates mountains, rainbow, waterfalls,and butterflies is working within your life at this moment to support and sustain you in the same way.

I get the question all the time. What if I look foolish, or funny doing it? You want to know what looks more foolish and funny a person who has the ability to fly walking around playing limited. The universe is here to support you in all that you do. When we understand this we begin to stand boldly on the edge of the cliff with the view in plane sight. We know that this vantage point allows us the freedom to see where we choose to go next rather than following the flock. Being a leader takes courage, and the wisdom to admin that you are afraid. I know that being the leader of a community means that each day I get to be real and say I don't know how we are going to get there, but I know we are going to get there together.

It is always a good thing to listen to our inner knowing. I have become aware that fear and anxiety are often confused. Anxiety is often what we feel before we take flight for the first time. Before we take that high dive, or jump from a plane. Yet the moment we take that next step we moves from anxiety into fulfillment. The knowledge that regardless of how I look I am actually flying. Take some time today and ask your higher self what is the next great adventure for you and pack your bags and hit the road.

I love you,

Thank you,

Rev Allen 

What will you discover as your greatest asset?

Day 84 Shells:

When I think about shells I think about how we often go around with a hard exterior in life. It is after we open and become vulnerable that we begin to really experience life to the fullest. Like the Abalone shell, I mentioned in today reading I love the ruggedness of the exterior as it reminds me that regardless of what others think of me. I know the truth of who I am. How many times are we judged based on our appearance? It is like going to a library and looking at all the books available and judging them based on their covers. It is after we dive into the book that we begin to understand the depth and brilliance that it holds. When writing seasons of change, I didn't about the cover until I was finished with the book. Once the book was complete, I knew exactly what the cover was supposed to look like.

Over the last few days, I have been meditating for long periods of time. As I shared with you last week, we are having a Season of Change abundance drive at the Amor Spiritual Center. Each day we are adding an additional penny over the day before thereby creating a new abundance habit. We then meditate for 10 minutes creating an opening within ourselves for the abundance to flow into our lives. I talk a great deal about our habits and how they affect our lives.

I have begun to be aware of the ways in which I close myself off from abundance in my thoughts, words, or actions. By observing this behavior and noticing when it arrives it allows me an opportunity for growth. I pause, say my abundant mantra "I allow the tides of abundance into my life now!" Thereby creating a new habit that allowed me to really become aware of the abundance that I have in my life each and everyday. Oftentimes we get so caught in a focal point in our life that we cannot see the abundance that surrounds us at every segment of our day. It's one of the reasons I ask people to go out in nature and look for the abundant and endless resources that are freely given. One walk on the beach and you will find countless sea shells that are available to us at any given moment. That is abundance! When we begin to open up our understanding, our awareness to the vast amount of abundance that we have flowing through our lives at any given moment we are creating a pathway for even more abundance to enter. It's like when you have an overdraft on your banking account we often focus on the frustration, irritation, and most often failure on our part to keep ample resources in the bank. I find that in those moments when I go for a walk on the beach or, in nature and witness the countless abundance that surrounds me. I can begin to put in perspective this one aspect of my life and realize that it is not the sum total of who I am. When I do this, it allows me to open to the flow of abundance within my life with ease and grace.

I think most people fear change. I have shared with you before the response that our community has to the word change "I can handle a new growth experience." As you begin to look at the areas in your life, that you have abundance notice where you're holding your energy within your body. Is it tight, or is it fluid and open? Our bodies are amazing. They show us everyday the directions were heading and what is coming next by the feelings that we have within ourselves. It's like the shell with this hard exterior and yet the brilliance of its magnificence is found within. What will you discover in your life today as your greatest asset?

I love you,

Thank you,

Read Allen

Find your rhythm and allow it to flow!

Day 83 Desert:

"Each desert experience in my life has brought with it wonderful and valuable information about my strengths, my power, and my endurance."

I am not sure about you, but I know that when I am in the mist of the desert experience it feels really dry, really hot, and really frustrating. As I shared with you in today's reading, heat is my kryptonite. This past weekend while doing yoga, the room was extremely warm and I got overheated. I have had countless people tell me that I would love hot yoga, and that I should really give it a try. It has been stated to me that I would adjust to the heat and be fine. One of the things I love most about this journey through nature, is my insatiable quest for information. Over this past year, I have read countless books, done a lot of research, and deepened my love for nature. One of the books that I read was written by Deepak Chopra and explained the Ayurvedic program that confirmed a deeper awareness about my body type and the how it works.

In nature, you don't often find daffodils growing in the desert. There's a reason. It's too hot for them. One of the things that I want to do to drive home with today is knowing ourselves. We spend most of our life looking for answers that we hold within ourselves all the time. One of the things I loved about Deepak Chopra's book was that it affirmed the truth that I had known all along. My particular body type has an aversion to heat. The best thing I can do when overheated is find the quickest way to cool down. I should avoid long exposure to the sun and hot humid weather. This was made clear by growing up in the south within a farming community and no air conditioning. The heat, humidity, and long days of working in the garden and tobacco often had me ill tempered, and abrasive.

When I relocated to the Pacific Northwest, I thought I had found Nirvana. It's cool damp climate was perfect for me. The lesson underneath all of this is in knowing who we are and how to work with that. By knowing my strengths, and my challenges I know more completely how to balance my life out. Case in point. While at yoga being overheated I chose to step outside and cool my body down. I know for myself to push on through the heat would have an adverse effect. Over the years, I've learned that a cool fan, a cool towel, or a cold shower are some of my favorite things. It helps me to regulate who I am and restore myself to the exquisite balance that I know to be me.

I share this with the understand that you will get at a deeper level the importance of understanding of knowing who you are. I believe that when we go through these desert experiences in our lives we gain a greater knowledge about ourselves. It is usually when we are in the fire of the moment that we absolutely understand what are need are, and what is of the utmost importance at that moment. A great many people talk about endurance and I really want to stress the value and the understanding that we each have an endurance in our individual way. And what is someone else's endurance point is not my endurance point. It is easy to get pulled into comparison, and not wanting to be left behind that I often placed myself in a compromising place. My deep and abiding love for the ocean has me often getting up earlier than anyone else for a walk on the beach. I know myself well enough to understand and know that it is not in my best interest or anyone else's that I should be on the beach during the hottest part of the day.

As we learn how to love ourselves more deeply we began to have a love affair with ourselves. Can you remember the first time that you fell in love with someone in your life? You did everything possible to make their world more appealing, more exciting. When we learn to do this for ourselves we begin to recognize that self-care, self nurturing, and self-love is of the utmost importance. Over the last season, I have put on a great deal of weight that I had it taken off through the use of the tools within this book. I stepped out of some wonderful habits that I have built and found myself once again filling myself up with comfort food and things that were not best for my body. Why? I needed a desert experience to greater learn this lesson.

Life is a brilliant and wonderful university. We're always learning. Pema Chodron has a quote that I adore" nothing ever goes away until it teaches us what we need to know." I know for myself that logging my food on a daily basis is the quickest way to love myself, and restore myself to my ideal body weight. The moment I move away from doing that which I learned while writing seasons and change, is the moment that I consciously choose to begin gaining weight.

This morning I had an awakening. I awoke at 3:30 in the morning with the understanding it was now time to meditate. I've learned over time these wake up calls bring great awareness and understanding. I placed my hands on my heart and I began to breathe. I allowed the chatter within my mind to rise to the top, I thanked it, I released it, and I returned to on my breath. I found myself being invited to this deep and abiding place of peace within the depths of my soul. It was this inward calling that was telling me to let go and be. The deeper I went into this spiral of unconditional love awaiting me the deeper I felt the call to be. I found myself surrounded by abundance and a greater love than I could fathom possible. Which was interrupted by mindless chatter, release, and a return to bliss. I embraced this amazing feeling that was happening within me. It was out past mind-body consciousness. It was as though I were seated firmly within my soul. After this powerful meditation I laid there and bask in the understanding that love is all there is. I learned in this moment of depth that "being" draws to us that which we want. Out of this understanding, I woke with the desire to write a love letter to myself. In that moment, I recognize that logging my food daily is a daily love letter to myself. It is though that love and compassion for myself that I love myself most brilliantly.

Each of us is a creative expression of divine energy. Find your rhythm and allow it to flow regardless of what others are doing around you. Be bold! Be your self! Be divine!

I love you,

Thank you,

Rev Allen

I am the "Spice" of Life!

Day 82 Herbs:

When I am empowered and know who I am I can lend my gifts to others to enhance their lives.

I am perfect in and of myself.

Sharing my love does not deplete my strength.

My love is a safe space for others to enhance their own flavor.

I love this reading today for many reasons, one of which it makes me think of my mom. My mom is this amazing woman who is very humble. She has consistently had an extraordinary gift to cook. Yet, I remember her constantly praying that her food would be a blessing to the people who ate it. Today my dad is doing a lot of the cooking as my mother has advanced Alzheimer's. One of the profound life lessons that I learned from my mom is that lending your gifts to others to enhance their lives does not deplete who you are. I learned this lesson through watching my mom help others achieve the goals they wish to achieve in life. Countless times she did this at the expense of not fulfilling her own desires so that others could have what they wanted and needed. My beloved says that he learns lessons from observing other people, therefore having no need to discover it himself.

I would like to say that I learned the lessons above without trial and error. The truth is I learned the lessons in perfect timing. I share with my clients that it is not important how many times we experience something in order to get the lesson. The gift is that we received the lesson. So what if it takes 40 years for me to realize that I am powerful and lovable. The lessons were learned.

I journey through a great deal of my life so frightened that I was not enough that I watered down the brilliance that I bring to the world. Imagine going to the spice drawer to pull out your favorite spice to find out the bottle is filled with water and that has weakened the spiced that you desired. Every day we choose not to see the brilliance of who we are, that is what we do with our lives. We lessen the impact that we make in the world. We minimize the potency of that which we give to the world.

Another one of the greatest life lessons that I have learned during this brilliant process of creating seasons of change is the understanding that giving love away never depletes love. I've shared with you the mantra that we repeat at Amor Spiritual Center around money. In this case however I will utilize the word love." I am a love magnet. Whatever I give out, comes back to me, heaped up and running over." We often share our love with such scarcity that somehow it is about run out. We often live in this fear that there's not enough to go around. Therefore we hold onto the love we have so tightly that it doesn't allow for fluidity. Love is the most fluid emotion that we have, it is the one that we are the least resistant to feeling. Love is like your favorite spice when it's spread around it enhances everything that it touches. When it held tightly in fear no one really benefits because there is no way to return it, as it hasn't been freely given.

Here we stand at the close of yet another season, and for myself a year of living these practices on a daily basis. The transformation that has happened to me is unfathomable. I have grown immensely in my ability to recognize and embody the power, strength, love that I have within. I have shared that love more freely than ever. Yet, with each new day a new lesson our experience helps me to open further to the creative possibilities that are mine. In so doing, I have created space not only for myself to thrive. But, to ensure that anyone who comes into my life is sure to find the space needed to thrive.

Today is the perfect days for you to "season" your life, and the lives of those around you with the brilliance of who you are. Remember, is not necessary for you to water down who you are so that others might feel less intimidated by the intensity of your flavor.

Thank you,

I love you,

Rev Allen

Restoration through Self Love

Day 81 Restoration:

We have within us all that is needed to transform any situation into a joyous experience. This line sums up one of the restorative beliefs that I hold true. In today's society, it is not difficult to get lost in my need for financial restoration or the complexity behind wanting something to be different than it currently is. I read a quote yesterday"When you experience fear about not having enough money, you emanate a vibration that prevents you from receiving what you are asking for." We can substitute anything we like in that sentence and find a deep hidden truth. How often does my feeling of "lack" create the very thing that I'm thinking about at a deeper level? How many times have we ask ourselves why we can't find someone when we are single or we feel alone? I believe most often we place our focus on what is missing, rather than where we want to be.

There was a time in my life when I was very single and felt little to no hope around finding love in my life ever again. You can imagine of course that I created a life of loneliness and made this fear a reality. I read book after book on how to have a healthy relationship. How to create the perfect love in my life, and yet I remained single.

Why is that? I kept my focus on what was missing.

Imagine my surprise when I started celebrating the love for others relationships, and begin loving and valuing the relationship that I had with myself. I found myself surrounded by people who wanted to date, and be in a relationship with me. I had shifted the focus from "lack", or what was missing to realizing the brilliance and greatness that I held within. Was my work complete? For me it was the beginning of the restoration process of my life.

Most if not all of my life I have based my value in the world on whether I was in a relationship or not. You can imagine the impact that had on my life. If I was single I was worthless and unlovable, and if I was in a relationship I should do everything within my power to keep love alive. You can't imagine the amount of times that I would look for a new relationship before the last one ended. Learning to love myself was the greatest restorative quality I have gained throughout my life. It is a subject that I think should be taught in every school system throughout the universe. We are often taught to look outside of ourselves for approval, success, and love.

The moment we have knowledge of our inner strength, and our inner beauty is the moment that we have a great spiritual awakening. For most of my life, I looked to an outside source for completion. I learned this in a very early age from religious teachings. I heard most of my childhood that I was unworthy, and one of my favorites "a filthy rag" in the sight of this creative intelligence. It was only when I began to recognize that I am a brilliant and beautiful expression of this love that I began to understand that there was nothing missing inside of me. I was created by my very nature to be complete. That I am an integral part of the make of this creative intelligence and there is no reason to diminish who I am. In fact when I recognize the greatness of who I am. I am literally creating the freedom for others to love themselves.

For most of my life, I didn't feel as if I had the right to love myself. In fact, I believed that it was immoral, egotistical, selfish, and unholy to love myself. Yes, it wasn't until I went into this deep soul-searching pilgrimage that I refer to as cancer that I discovered it was the old beliefs that I was allowing to consume me from within. The moment that I changed my consciousness around hating who I was inside two loving who I was inside the healing started instantaneous. Was it an overnight miracle? My answer is yes. It was at that moment, that I begin to understand that who I believe I am is of the utmost importance. What others think of me is truly none of my business. When I live life asking my highest self what is mine to do in this moment, and follow that truth. That is the moment that I live a life filled with success, and love.

It can be quite easy to get lost in what society thinks is the best brand of dish detergent, or what is this year's best car. However, the real questions that I ask all of my clients. Who is it that you want to be in the world? What is it that makes you come alive? I often get answers like" I'm not sure." My response" that is the perfect place to begin."

Today spend time finding out what makes you come alive. Do more of that! Who cares what the world thinks of you? Today is the best day of your life, create a world that you would be proud to live in.

Thank you,

I love you,

Rev Allen

The Journey Within

Day 80 Feathers:

It seems impossible that 90 days ago I was creating a headdress for myself out of crate paper and decorative items to celebrate the individuality of who I am. It seems almost unimaginable to believe what I have accomplished over the last years utilizing the tools within this book. It seems equally fitting to talk about that I understand and know that emotion, feelings, and how we see ourselves it is of the utmost importance. I find myself today in this deep place emotionally looking for an answer. I know the way to find the answer is by going to that sacred space within that is connected to the creative consciousness. . It is not found looking outside of myself. Yet I find myself time and again doing my best to find it there.

I think it perfectly fitting that the soul card that I chose today was a wellspring of love springing up from within. I have spoken many times within this book of the ravens that live near our home and often visit outside our window. It seemed only fitting that I would have someone to create for me a sacred feather for house blessings and cleansing rituals. I have found within the pages of this book this deep and abiding desire to understand and know how nature works at its deepest level. It is my desire to embody these qualities within. I recognize that today's reading coincides with the emerging of young birds of other species returning to the Great Northwest from their winter's journey to the south. How fitting it is it that I would be here in this book today looking at the divine qualities I hold within.

My beloved mentor reminds me that often times the way I write expresses how vulnerable I am to the world. That often I share deep and intimate things openly with this brilliant and beautiful heart of mine. And yet other times I am very quick, direct, and to, the point. I was reminded when I read today's reading of the final stages of writing this book. I had chosen the 90 expressions of nature that wanted to be expressed, and I had written about the qualities they hold within. It was my profound desire to have completion and publication that often pushed me to the finish line. One of the things I am most aware of today within nature is that for every action there is an equal or greater reaction. Therefore when I push, I need to understand that there is an equal force within nature pushing back. It is this force that keeps us standing firmly on the ground, instead of spending out somewhere into the great unknown. When I began to understand that as a fundamental truth in life I had a greater understanding and appreciation of the word surrender.

Over the last few days, I've spent time going within communicating with my soul. I've spent intimate time asking my greater consciousness what is next, what am I do, and left the question within this void knowing that the answer I needed was found within. Many times we think of where we want to go next and instantly start to plan and plot how to manifest that in our lives, rather than embodying and understanding of what it feels like to live from this new state of consciousness. One of the greatest gifts I have ascertained from this book is my willingness to go to the depths of my soul leave the question, wait for the answer, and allow the knowingness that is, to emerge and manifesting in my life.

It's like a miracle in the seed. We drop off countless seeds into this hallowed empty void commonly known as dirt. We consider that the magic is within the dirt when the truth is the miracle is within the seed. The darkness of the soil is really only holding the consciousness that the seed has within itself all along. That is why it is so important that I spend time in the depths of my soul planting and asking the truth about who I am. It is there that I find the answers that allows me to open from within, have the courage to reach for height that I've never reached before, and to manifest the fulfillment of what I've known to be my truth all along.

It seems impossible that a bird could fly when we look singularly at a feather, and yet we witnessed it everyday. And why is it that some birds with feathers can fly and others cannot. I know there are many scientific understandings about why this is possible. Yet, the greater question for me is how many times will I allow what other people think about me, and my abilities to stop me from taking flight?

I love you,

Thank you,

Rev Allen